#5 - A Little Too Personal Post

For the past 2 months I have been able to be pregnant again. This was quite a surprise as we were nowhere near "trying" to be pregnant. From previous experience I have taken opportunities of being pregnant as a blessing for as long as I am able to hold a pregnancy because I have had several miscarriages in the past. Most of my pregnancies I lose at 6 weeks, so this time when I had made it past that mark I was starting to feel more hopeful that this one might be the one. The longest I have been able to carry was 9 weeks - my 2nd pregnancy. That was an especially difficult time because I had heard the heartbeat and had finally been able to let down my guard that this might actually work, however, at a routine checkup the heartbeat was no more.

One thing I have learned through my journey to build my family is that Heavenly Father is really in charge. I unfortunately never learned this through my miscarriage trial, but was able to learn this through the process of Madeleine's adoption. I had felt so long that He was not listening to me when I pleaded for a child (we have been in the baby-making business for almost 5 years now). I have since learned that this was terribly untrue. I know now He knew all along my pain and the trials I was enduring and that He had a plan for me. I know He had Madeleine desginated for our family and was waiting for the opportunity to send her to us in the way that would bless us the most, and through adoption our joy was magnified by also having close ties with a loving birth family.

So when we found out about our surprise pregnancy (there have been times when we have tried for a year and not been able to get pregnant), I kept reminding myself that it really is His will and no matter what He loves me. I ended up losing the baby last night. That brings the total to 5 miscarriages. Although the physical pain is great, it has been easier for me to choose. I can choose to wallow in the emotional pain of another terrific loss, or I can choose to realize that Heavenly Father knows the depths of my heart and have faith that He has something greater for me. I choose the second option this time.

This is our personal trial that we have had to endure, I know there are many who suffer with other things, but I do know no matter what the trial Heavenly Father loves each of us individually and has a plan of happiness for all of us. I am grateful that I can now feel my Heavenly Father's love.

Taxes Aren't Everything!

This has been a packed week and a half! I got the wonderful opportunity last weekend to go on an all-girls weekend trip with a bunch of my friends up to the GA mountains - unfortunately I left the SD card with my pictures at my mom's store, so no pictures to post of that, yet! Also because of my card mixup, I didn't get pictures of my newest nephew born to Steve and Lynnette on Thursday night - still is nameless, but narrowed down to Brady, Brett or Tyler.

On Monday I started watching my niece, Katelyn, while my sister is at work. This is a huge change for me because with Madeleine, I usually get up at 8, when she wakes up, give her a bottle and play with her until she's ready to go down for her morning nap, usually around 9:30 - then I get my breakfast and get showered and ready for the day (her morning naps are usually 1.5 - 2 hours long). Then she wakes up, I run my outside errands, eat lunch and put her down for her afternoon nap, which she'll sleep for about 2-3 hours. Katelyn is dropped off at 7 (I'm usually not dressed at this point) and I've finally gotten her trained to come lay in bed with me until Madeleine gets up. Katelyn is still "supposed" to take an hour nap during the day - I usually make her at least lay down for my sanity check. I had a real hard time the first couple of days getting adjusted, but I think I'm finally getting into the swing of things. Then my sister went out of town for Spring Break and my parents and I are switching off in taking care of Katelyn. So Katelyn was the lucky girl that got to go with us to do our taxes on Friday.

It's really not as bad as it sounds. I actually love going down there. My Aunt Martha (my dad's brother's wife), graciously, does our taxes for us. So while we are there we get to spend time with my aunt, uncle and cousins. My grandma (Mom's mom) also lives in the same town so we got to stop in and visit with her as well. And, to round it all off we also got to see Madeleine's birth mom and birth grandma - quite the busy day, but a really fun one!

We were supposed to meet up with Madeleine's birth mom and dad for lunch, but that didn't end up working out so we ate lunch by ourselves and vowed to meet up later on. So instead we stopped at my grandma's house. She was so happy to see us and see the great grandchildren. Katelyn even got to take a ride in her elevator chair. It was supposed to be one ride per grandchild (we used to LOVE this when we were little), however, Katelyn learned (like I did long ago) how absolutely joyful it is to sit while going up the stairs and greedily indulged herself in another ride. I should have been mad at her for disobeying - but it was so darn funny! Grandma was beside herself because she is always so cautious about following the rules, but I think she too found humor in the naughty 3 year old.

Katelyn, Grandma, and Madeleine

We next went to my aunt's office to do our taxes where we met up with Madeleine's birth grandma and birth mom and my cousin Krista came over as well. It was a packed office as you can imagine, just before the tax deadline, but it was still so much fun to talk and visit together. Uncle Ken came by with my cousin Hannah and decided to take Katelyn with him back to his house so they could play and minimize the destruction to the office! We went over to his house after we were done with our tax party and got to have some fun while Madeleine conked out watching the girls be silly.

The Cool Kids, Hannah and Katelyn

Needs no introduction...

The next Hannah Montana?

Katelyn thinks Uncle Ken should join in the fun!

All in all a great day!

Easter Celebrations

Our Easter morning started off with Madeleine finding out what the Easter Bunny had brought her. She's not even 1 so the Easter Bunny went a little easy on her. She got a new stuffed bunny, several plastic Easter eggs to play with and a brand new rubber duckie.

We then went to church, but I couldn't tell you much of what was talked about because little missy thought it was really fun to talk and sing at the top of her lungs at the most inopportune times, so I spent most of time in the hall.

After church I tried to get my patient husband to take a picture of me and Maddy in our Easter attire. After a couple of clicks, he was ready to be done - I wasn't thrilled with pictures, so this ended up being the best one (you can only imagine what the others looked like!).

Then we were headed off to our Easter celebrations - first stop, the Torrez home for an Opp Easter. We had tons and tons of food and we gouged ourselves and then as you can see, the men took their time on the couch. I had to include this picture of Nana and Maddy because I love the way how Anne's arm is transparent (she was trying to do a funny pose and I caught her mid movement). I also loved Kaitlyn's face in this picture, I have no idea what she was planning with the shipping tape!

Next we were off to the Mills home. Yep, we still sit around the dining room table with the crystal and china for Sunday dinners, and Andrew decided to catch a second round of desserts (Mississippi Mud, can you blame him?) Next, another familiar couch shot (what is it about men and couches anyways?) and a few pictures of the cousins playing. I have to say my little nephew's bank outfit cracked me up!

Towards the end of the night, Madeleine had her fill, she was tired! Papa thought it was time to play a game of Patty-Cake. I absolutely love seeing my dad with children, it makes me think of how he was with us when we were little. He is a darn cute Papa, if I do say so myself!

7 - 1/2 Months Update

1 Month

7 Months


It's so hard to see Madeleine grow when she's with me everyday, but when I look back at past pictures, I'm amazed at how big she is! She is such a fun baby at 7 months - she really has such a fun personality and is a very easy-going baby (as long as it is not 12:00 church :) - makes me a little nervous if we ever do have anymore children what kind of terror is in store for us!

At this stage she loves (and I mean LOVES) to play, especially with other kids. She loves her laugh and learn house she got for Christmas, especially opening and shutting the door and eating the balls. She's getting really good at scooting around, she loves to rock on all fours and is slowly starting to pull up on things. We like to play patty cake together and peek-a-boo and sometimes this little piggy. She also likes to try to attack us with her mouth. She opens her mouth really wide and grabs both sides of your face to try to lick/bite you, she got Andrew good the other day in the chin - in the meantime this causes her to go in a fit of giggles.

She loves apples with just about anything so it's easy to give her a new food as long as it is with apples. She pretty much only takes a paci when she's ready to sleep; I'm ready for her to be weened of it altogether.

I thought her noises are perfectly normal for any baby, but when anybody hears her they start laughing, so I guess she is a little extraordinary! She likes to trill her tounge (like rolling her r's) we call her our little birdie and she just started making this smacking noise by sticking her tounge out and smacking it against her upper lip. She has also started scrunching her nose up and blowing in and out she really hard (this one is my favorite because my sister, Kayleen used to do that when she was a baby). She is a very loud talker and singer - I absolutely love her personality.

Here's some of our favorite pictures of her from the past month...

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

I'm a sucker... I was at a consignment sale a few weeks ago on a 1/2 off Saturday (go to thebargainwatcher.com for sales in your area) and found this adorable St. Patrick's Day shirt - that I had to have (c'mon it was only $1). I got home, very proud of my purchase, when I show Andrew he replies, "But, I'm not Irish". To which I replied, "But, I am!".

So yesterday she got to wear her, "Kiss me, I'm Irish" shirt. To celebrate the day I made a yummy Shepherd's Pie.

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

CALIFORN-I-A!!!

Hallelujah! We finally made it back to California! We have been talking for years (I kid you not) about making a trip to San Diego and Los Angeles to visit Andrew's family that lives on that side of the country. We had more frequent flier miles to burn and were still trying to decide if we should take the time and one day - surprise! We got a wedding invitation from our good friend Sam Woodard who was going to be getting married in the San Diego Temple. That tipped the scales and by that night, Andrew had our tickets booked and all other necessary arrangements made for our trip.

We left early in the morning on Thursday, February 28th to catch our flight. Amazingly I was able to pack all of my stuff and Madeleine's in one bag - a fact I am very proud of! Our flight was near perfection flying from Atlanta to San Diego - beautiful clear skies and the plane was definitely not full so we had a row to ourselves and a nice seat in the middle for Madeleine to play. She was terrific on that flight - slept for half of it and played the other half. We made it into San Diego, picked up our rental car and were anxious to make it to our first stop - In-N-Out Burgers. We stuffed our tummies and drove to Andrew's Aunt Janice's house in Vista. Andrew's Uncle Morris is the mayor of Vista and could not be any nicer - the politician stereotypes do not apply here! They were ready to receive us with open arms - we had a fabulous dinner (Andrew's aunts are seriously excellent cooks!) and I headed to Enrichment with Aunt Janice where I learned how to make jewelry with Sister Schlack (I loved her name :).

Friday we went to Oceanside to see the beach. Unfortunately it was not the sunny California weather we expected. It was overcast and chilly. However, that didn't stop the surfers - I think we counted 13 die hards out catching waves - what a blast it was to watch them perform! We walked on the pier and had another yummy burgers and fries meal at Ruby's at the end of the pier, it was delicious and definitely a unique spot!

Saturday was filled with the wedding. We had to be down at the temple at 10 AM for an 11 AM sealing because we needed to give instruction to Sam's brother who would be watching Madeleine in the waiting room. By the time they finally got the sealing (sealings are LDS temple weddings) done, we didn't make it out of the temple until 1:30 - it had to have been the longest wedding I have EVER been to. I felt so sorry for Sam's brother - I guess Madeleine had been a little fussy so when we came back he said, "I'm never babysitting ever again!". Whoops! It was another overcast, chilly day, but we were able to get some pictures in front of the San Diego Temple - which I might add is breathtaking especially when you are driving down the highway and see it pop-up, it is magnificent! Then on to the bridal luncheon and to the reception - by the end of the day we were exhausted, but we were so happy to be able to be there for Sam's special day.

Sunday we went to church with Andrew's aunt and uncle. I loved their ward, tons of old people with great names - like Snodgras - another favorite. It was fun to meet all the friendly Californians, but we were ready to get home for our feast! Aunt Janice had prepared quite the spread for us - roast beef, roast vegetables, homeade rolls, salad with a homeade vinegarette, fresh cooked green beans, homeade applesauce, and homeade mashed potatoes (am I forgetting anything?) - disgusting that I remember the food. To digress, I saw the funniest thing on SNL a couple of weeks ago, it said - The Food Network, it's like porn for fat people. This cracked me up because I am a Food Network junkie! As someone at church put it today - I am a foodie :) - I like that. Back on topic, Andrew's cousin and his wife and kids came down to spend the day with us - it was so much fun! Tommy and his wife Julie and kids were so much fun to get to know. Julie started making jewelry about 5 years ago and has now been featured on the red carpet and has some of her pieces worn on the Gene Simmons Show and The Millionaires Matchmakers Club (she's featured in the credits) it was cool to learn how she did it - I love success stories! They have a little Maddy too, so Maddy and Maddy were buds! I had to put Madeleine down for a nap and it was killing the girls, they kept wanting me to wake her up - not a prayer. We were so grateful for Aunt Janice and Uncle Morris and all they did for us, they had us poshed out at their house and had shown us such a great time. It was hard to pry ourselves away and head to our next destination - Aunt Laura's house.

Aunt Laura's house is fabulous, it is the perfect homey home. You feel so welcome while you are there it is great! That Sunday all her kids that live in Calfornia and their spouses and families came down for dinner and were anxiously waiting our arrival. We called after we left Aunt Janice's and said we were on our way; they were very happy and decided to hang around and wait for us to arrive. We were so glad they did! We got to see Andrew's cousin Jeffrey and his wife Alison and their cute boys and Jennifer and her husband Craig and kids as well as Jon and Janna. There was so much commotion and I loved it, we felt right at home. We spent some time catching up until we were all pooped and the kids were cranky and called it a night.

Monday we lazily got up, I walked with Aunt Laura, and then she made us a delicous breakfast of eggs, grits and bacon (I'm telling you, it is the life in California). Later we got packed up and drove to Jennifer's house to hang out. After another trip to In-N-Out, we put the kiddies down to nap and kept on chatting and Jennifer graciously gave me a trim. Can I say again how much I loved Andrew's cousins? I thought it was so funny because she mentioned that she will do lots of "weaves" for people - coming from Georgia, a weave means something totally different than it does in California. I had so much fun haning out with Jennifer, it made me really sad that we live so far apart. After the girls got up from their nap we went out looking at houses and it made me very thankful to live in Georgia where I can afford a home - I don't know how they do it there. We came home and made dinner and Janna and her guy friend came over and we talked and laughed until late.

Tuesday I was beginning to feel the repurcussions of my trip, I started to feel a little tired, but I wasn't going to let it get me down (yet). Andrew's Aunt Ginger and Uncle David came over, and it was so great to see them and to catch up. We wanted to see more of Aunt Ginger, but she was quite the busy-bee and had a ton of stuff going on that week so this is the only day we got to spend with her. If you know Andrew, he has problems staying still and was itching to get out of the house - I was exhausted and didn't want to go anywhere so he left me and went to his heaven on earth - REI. After a nice nap, Andrew came home and we spent a much deserved evening in watching TV and laughing with Janna and Jon. Janna was such a sweetheart and gave up her room so we had a nice place to rest our heads at the end of the day.

We were supposed to come home on Wednesday, but we decided we don't make it out this way very often (once a decade, maybe) so we decided to extend our trip a couple of days and changed our return to Friday. Andrew's mother and my grandfather grew up in Seal Beach and Long Beach and we wanted to scout out the areas where our family lived. We found the street where Andrew's mom lived about the time she met Andrew's dad. It was neat to see the area and spend time close to where she lived. Next we went to Long Beach and I was so looking forward to seeing where my grandfather lived. He was born in 1911 and moved to Long Beach before he was even a year old. What's even cooler is that he lived just a block off the ocean (man, I wish we owned that property today!), so we got to drive the street that he grew up on, the house is no longer there and the properties are so much closer together - but it was so fun. We also journeyed to the high school he went to. He attended the first year the school was opened in 1925 and it is still standing today - I took lots of pictures, and I was so excited to see where he learned. We then made our way back to Aunt Laura's because Jennifer was ready to show us the sights of downtown LA, Santa Monica and Malibu. We go to see the Los Angeles Temple where Andrew's parents were sealed, we drove up the coast to Malibu and up on Pepperdine's campus (which is to die for, incredible views - I have no idea how people learn in such a setting) - the campus is guarded by a gate but Jennifer sweet-talked the guard by saying, "We're totally from Georgia", hmmmm - not exactly southern dialect but the guard was none the wiser and let us in -, then up to the Santa Monica Pier and walked a couple of blocks to another REI, and it was worth the trip because I found a Leonidas Chocolatier - I used to work for a Belium-based company which my dear friends there would send me these delicious Belgian treats and I couldn't believe that I could get them in the U.S. As celebrity-crazed as I can be (Andrew calls it my smut TV, I love Entertainment Tonight) I wanted to see a celebrity and drive down Rodeo Drive and see the Kodak Theatre and stars on the street. No luck on the celebrity front, but we did get to see all the ridiculously priced stores and see the theatre and stars. I can only imagine what a "star" must think when they get their star in front of a convenience store or junk shop - do they even care? We finally made it back - tired, but fulfilled!

Thursday I crashed! I picked up a nasty illness which knocked the wind out of me. I had a fever and spent the whole day in bed. I was popping the Mucinex and Tylenol as religiously as I could without OD'ing - it was pretty miserable. Andrew left with Madeleine so I could get some good sleep and Aunt Laura was wonderful in taking care of me, she made me some delicious soup that was just perfect. Andrew traveled up through the canyons and ended up taking fabulous pictures of the views up there. When he made it back, my fever was finally beginning to break. Aunt Laura made her famous chocolate chip cookies which I was able to enjoy and spent the rest of the night hanging out watching TV - I was just so thankful that I was finally out of bed!

Friday we packed up and made our way back to the airport. I was ready to get to my own house to finish my recuperation, but I knew we would miss being with our family. We truly had such a fabulous time, Aunt Laura works circles around us - I would put a dirty bottle on the counter, and before I could look twice it was clean again. We had so much fun visiting with so many great cousins, it's hard that we live so far away. Our flight back was not nearly as smooth as our flight out. We flew out of LAX, but on a packed plane. However, we did get to sit next to a struggling actor, so I was able to cure my celebrity quest a little, even if so far he is a no-namer. Madeleine had finally had it - I think that the time change and being out of her environment and the exhaustion of our trip finally compiled. She wasn't terrible by any means, but she did not want to sit for very long. Upon our descent into Atlanta we had nasty, and I mean NASTY turbulence. Luckily the pilot had just put the fasten seat belt light on so we were all in our seats. It was so bad, I didn't feel like I could securely hold Madeleine so I gave her to Andrew to bear hug. I have flown a good bit, and have never been scared until that moment, I was terrified! Fortunately we out flew it and were able to safely land. Afterwards, I asked the flight attendant how that measured up in the turbulence she had experienced to which she replied that was the worst she has ever had - made me feel a little less like a wimp. Apparently a Luftstansa plane flying about the same time and same area that night had to have a few of their passengers hospitalitized because of turbulence injuries - we were very fortunate.

We were so happy to make it home and again we are so grateful to our family to make our trip so fantastic! Sorry for such a long and for some a boring post - I'm glad I have the details recorded so I won't feel guilty on my lack of journal writing. Now we've got to start shedding our California lbs!

Teeth - Finally!

I was beginning to wonder when we might see those first two pearly whites. I would check every couple of days with my finger and nothing! I even took Madeleine with me to my teeth cleaning (my dentist's office is fabulous!) to have them check - nothing! The pediatrician has checked her - nothing! When her glands were developing she was a constant drool machine and people would say - oh, she's teething! I knew better - no teeth!

Finally, we were in the airport about to board our flight to San Diego when I mentioned to Andrew I hadn't checked for her teeth and wondered what the progress was - mind you there were absolutely no symptoms of teething to make me think there would be anything there - no fever, no fussiness, no drool, no biting everything in sight, but lo and behold, I felt two little pearly buds. If it is even possible, they make her look even cuter!